Tuesday, January 02, 2007

where i stand

he said something that went like this:

"always be careful. i dont know who you drink with. when you drink with me, i will take care of you because you are my friend. But some other guys,.. they are like animals."

ha?!

others would most probably not understand what my friend meant when he said this to me. But I understood it.. - so well, that on that night, I knew where I stand in his life. I knew where he wants me. I am his friend, and should he decide to keep me, I should remain as that.

And I have learned to accept that.. surprisingly. Unlike before when I was waiting everyday for him to like me more than as a friend.

Hay.. I was happy on the first night of 2007. And as I have told him, I want to thank him for being with me, and for taking care of me when I was a little drunk.

He was holding my wrist (not my hand, because that is reserved of course, I believe, to the more important girl in his life, :p) the whole time we were walking. Maybe, he was thinking that I might trip. As soon as we reached our place, it rained. We sat down for a few minutes, and talked. He even gave me his polo because he thought I was feeling cold.

If these things happened before, I would make up reasons for him. That would be unfair to both of us - to him, because I am misreading him; and to me, because I am making myself more likely to get hurt.

So on that night, I stopped inventing reasons. Maybe, I should even stop asking why.